Occasionally, a salesman will come to the teacher’s room and try to sell something (I’m not sure what they sell, or who they speak to about it, I only know when they come and when they go.)
The Japanese salesman is easy to spot. He is dressed well, his hair is nicely styled, and he is filled with a deep feeling of soul-crushing shame. When he enters the teacher’s room, he apologizes profusely and bows so deeply that one can see the spirits of his ancestors bowing along with him. He has invaded another’s workplace. His ancestors have been dishonored. When he leaves, it’s more of the same. As he apologizes for time wasted, somewhere nearby, corpses slowly turn under headstones. The indignity reaches back for generations.
So, some of the other JETs and I got to thinking, “what can these salesmen do to make their intrusions less shameful?” We came up with an idea:
The salesman enters – apologizes profusely. It can’t be helped. He brings with him brochures and two attendants (maybe trainees). After making a small pitch, the salesman makes his brochures available. He then apologizes once more, bows deeply, and, in a final expression of his humility, expires. Not a messy, blood-filled death – rather, he instantly, and of his own willpower, ceases to live. His attendants then carry his body from the room, bowing and apologizing as they do so.
I really think that would take a lot of the stress and embarrassment out of being a Japanese salesman.
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4 comments:
You should have titled this entry "Death of a Salesman"
It reminds me of the time I worked in an office building in Newark. Every week a shoe shine man would shuffle in and go from office to office shining shoes for a dollar(it was a long time ago). I later learned that he put five sons through college and drove a really big Benz. So maybe life is not as bad as it appears. LZ
Salesmen should do that here too. Not because of the dishonor. But because who wouldn't buy something from a guy you knew was gonna die just to make the sale? I'd probably buy almost anything from a guy like that.
Seth you should publish these entries. they get better and better.
but in that case, I would not title it "death of a salesman."
Hey man, I'm highly enjoying the blog. Ditto Becca's comment--the quality keeps improving.
Went to Sundance last week for the premiere of Choke. One day it'll be us, buddy. One day.
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